Posts tagged MITT ROMNEY
Posts tagged MITT ROMNEY
Yet another edition of “I’m sick of this shit.”
This isn’t funny. I’ve worked on campaigns and fielded calls asking if this is really the case. The 33 shares, as of last night at 1:00 AM, worries me. I’ve seen this crap on flyers distributed to low-income neighborhoods that typically have lower levels of education and voter registration.
This goes for both parties. Stop it. It’s not cute, it’s not funny, it’s viral voter suppression. You might think you’re clever enough to get the joke, but there’s people out there who don’t realize it’s a goddamn terrible joke — especially when you add some official-sounding law to it, like the image above.
Hey Grass Roots Republicans — it’s “grassroots.” The president is not “Barry Soetoro.” His name is Barack Obama. Also, just stick to the shitty MS paint comparisons of unicorns and a Romney presidency. You’re better at that. You know the biggest thing they have in common, kiddos? The chances of both existing are equally imaginary.
That’s how this whole election things works, right?
Well, guys… this settles it. While Mittens apparently shares enough qualities with Unicorn to be an aphrodisiac, unicorn is obviously out of the running for president. Mitt Romney has met the exceedingly low qualifications of being more real than a unicorn and allowed on an airplane.
However, you know where Mitt isn’t allowed? AIR FORCE ONE, Y’ALL!
I just can’t with these people. And I assure you, Grass Roots Republicans is real Facebook page and 100% serious. Now, can we get a Venn Diagram of those who believe in Mitt Romney AND Unicorns? I would imagine there’s overlap.
Politico takes on five questions for us electoral wonks wondering if the approach of Hurricane Sandy might just throw a monkey wrench into our projections.
That doesn’t make us completely heartless, right?
One of these things is not like the others. One of these things just doesn’t belong. Can you tell which thing is not like the others? By the time I finish my song…
Ever have one of those moments where you truly can’t help yourself?
That would be one of mine above. Background on Mittens being the Grinch that stole Halloween here. I’ve talked to several of my friends with kids about this. They’re worried that they won’t be able to take their kids, so parents are now trying to organize a group or something. I’ve seen several adults dismissing this as not a big deal, BECAUSE ZOMG ROMNEY IT’S JUST TRICK-OR-TREAT, but that’s bullshit for two big reasons:
This is a nightmare for single parents without much support. Pretty much everyone I’ve talked to who is a single parent has asked someone to take their kid(s) and gotten a no. Seriously, I don’t know that I’d say yes — kids are extremely hyper on Halloween. But I’d probably make an exception. Further, the new day falls smack in the middle of K-5 parent-teacher conferences. As one of my friends wrote, “How in the hell can I be in two places at once?”
This might not be a big deal to some adults, but to a kid, THIS IS A HUGE GODDAMN DEAL. Remember trick-or-treating? It’s one of the biggest thrills of the year, especially if you’re a working class kiddo living in suburbia. One of my friends told her daughter they might not go. She’s seven and cried herself to sleep in the living room. She was supposed to go with her friends, dressed as Disney princesses, and my friend was going to dress as the Fairy Godmother and take them. Try finding someone to take five seven-year-old girls trick-or-treating. No really. Try it.
After listening to my friends with kids stress out over this, it just pisses me off more that Romney is coming just because The Washington Post ran a feature on how the bailout saved Defiance. Another one of my friends wrote, “That is what I’m sayin!! He is just coming to do ‘damage control’ for his campaign here. Otherwise Defiance wouldn’t even be a speck on the map to him.”
So yeah. I couldn’t help myself when this smug sanctimommy with cutsey-named kids just HAD to share with the newspaper.
Mitt Romney is hitting up my hometown of Defiance, Ohio next week at the exact time trick-or-treat was scheduled. I say was, because the mayor, Bob Armstrong, now says trick-or-treat will be moved. One problem: Many parents took Thursday off work or otherwise rearranged their schedules for trick-or-treat, and are now faced with trying to change that on just two day’s notice. As a result, a lot of kiddos are missing out on trick-or-treat. Also, most schools have parent-teacher conferences on Tuesday, the night the mayor chose. So double whammy for single parents.
Here’s a pal of mine from high school with his fantastic suggestion. I love little Ethan telling his mom not to vote for Romney because of the whole trick-or-treat thing. Ethan, you’re a smart kid.
Why is Mitt Romney hitting up D-town? Here’s why: “GM is alive in Defiance, Ohio. But Obama’s hopes here may not be." The GM plant employed 1,700 before the economic crash. It ground to a halt. People stopped paying their mortgages, and even grocery stores went out of business. Now, because of the bailout, the plant employs 1,300 and is growing.
Of course, Romney isn’t actually going to the plant. Instead, he’s speaking at the high school and will be accompanied by country musicians John Rich and Randy Owen from the group Alabama.
And if parents take my buddy’s suggestion, some kiddos asking for candy. I encourage parents to do this if they’re irked by the Romney campaign’s choice to announce this stop, or the mayor’s choice to move trick-or-treat. I don’t usually endorse using kids for political ends, but hey, there’s nothing cuter than wee ones in Halloween costumes. Get your tickets here!