Cognitive Dissonance

"Democracy! Bah! When I hear that I reach for my feather boa!" - Allen Ginsberg

Posts tagged corporations

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My Doritos is a taco! My corporation is a person!

Have y’all seen that commercial? It’s for the Doritos Taco Locos at Taco Bell, which was sent from heaven as proof baby jeebus is cool with stoners. Or something. Seriously, they’re awesome.


Every damn time I see that commercial, I’ve taken to yelling, “My corporation is a person!” But my person can’t be a corporation, no matter how much I as a Uterused-American wish it to be so. That’s TOO freedomish! Therefore, less rights for you, Meg!


And now with SCOTUS shooting down Montana’s defense of their campaign finance law, it’s more likely the Citizens United decision is here to stay. And it’s more likely other states could see their campaign finance laws go the way of Montana’s.

My Doritos is a taco, my corporation is a person…

Tastes like freedoms!

Filed under America Taco Bell corporations are people? politics SCOTUS corporations Citizens United campaign finance reform now consumerism

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You know, I think that’s so self-evident I’m not sure that needs to be answered - come on. Of course corporations are not people. Come on. Who would say such an outlandish thing? I can’t imagine anyone running for president would say something like that.

Jon Huntsman, answering a question on corporate personhood at a campaign stop in Concord, N.H. today, and taking a well-deserved swipe at the top-polling Mitt Romney. Watch it:

Romney famously insisted at a rally in August that “corporations are people, my friend,” and continues to defend the claim.

(h/t: ThinkProgress)

(Source: cognitivedissonance)

Filed under Jon Huntsman politics corporations are not people Mitt Romney GOP Republican Republicans zing Election 2012 touche corporate personhood corporations

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John Walsh gets political on America’s Most Wanted on Dec. 17th, 2011. He begins by talking about how we’re balancing severe cuts on the backs on teachers, firefighters, police officers, and others who contribute greatly to society and asking nothing of those who’ve benefited.

And then shit gets real. An excerpt from Walsh’s statement, courtesy of Crooks and Liars:

Wow. America’s Most Wanted host John Walsh has an earful about cutting the government to spark economic growth this week. He notes letting police and firefighters go is bad for our communities. Flint, MI which laid off two-thirds of its police force, according to Walsh has become a “small city murder capital of the U.S.”

But then, Walsh goes full Occupy.

"Who’s going to pay for the economic meltdown - the huge debt?" He says, "How about companies? Companies that have made more money than in the whole history of the world and they’ve done it with less people. Some of the Fortune 500 companies pay no state taxes at all. We all know about GE not paying federal taxes."

And he continues to rail on this conservative cure-all for our economic woes: “It’s a quick fix but it’s not a good fix. We got to make the corporations pay more money and we can’t let these people [police] go. You got to speak up.”

America’s Most Wanted now airs at 9 p.m. on Friday on the Lifetime channel. Is it just me, or does John Walsh lay out a fantastic defense for those who are against cutting vital services so others can have an even more obscene amount of wealth?

To detractors: I’ll stop supporting movements like Occupy Wall Street when corporations stop occupying Congress. It’s not that I don’t think people should be rich. I just don’t think they should be able to buy themselves a pet Congress. 

(Source: cognitivedissonance)

Filed under John Walsh Inequality politics tax cuts America's Most Wanted teachers police public sector workers taxes injustice Corporations Corporate taxation

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Rep. Walsh: That’s not the problem! The problem is you’ve got to be consistent. And I dont want government meddling in the marketplace. Yeah, they move from Goldman Sachs to the White House, I understand all of that. But you gotta’ be consistent. And it’s not the private marketplace that created this mess. What created mess was your government, which has demanded for years that everybody be in a home. And we’ve made it easy as possible for people to be in homes. […] Don’t blame banks, and don’t blame the marketplace for the mess we’re in right now! I am tired of hearing that crap! This pisses me off! Too many people don’t listen. […] Quiet for a minute! Quiet for a minute!
Constituent: Joe, what did I say–
Rep. Walsh: Quiet for a minute or I’m going to ask you to leave. You need to listen, or I’m going to ask you to leave.

Rep. Joe Walsh of Illinois, screaming at a constituent during his “Cup of Joe with Joe” in Gurnee, Illinois this Sunday.

Just a reminder: Walsh is the "True Blue" family values leader who is over $100K behind on child support payments and may be cited for contempt if he ditches his next hearing.

Video here:

Walsh also falsely claimed that unions somehow have more power and influence than corporations in America. The constituent had asked a very reasonable question regarding the influence of bank lobbyists and the revolving door of former senators becoming lobbyists or heads of corporations, or vice versa.


Filed under Joe Walsh Illinois GOP Conservative conservatives anger rage unions STFU Republican republicans eek responsibility lobbying banksters Corporations Corporations are not people politics

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So then there’s this…

Just as mass incarceration has burdened American taxpayers in major prison states, so is the use of inmate labor contributing to lost jobs, unemployment and decreased wages among workers — while corporate profits soar.

The use of forced labor in prisons took off in the early 1990s. Funny that. So did our incarceration rate:

Our prison industrial complex is nothing but corporate slave labor. Not saying people are purposefully being locked up to be a captive labor force for corporations, but with a largely privatized prison system, plus corporate contracts for labor going to said prisons, it’s an awfully interesting correlation, no?

So then there’s this

Just as mass incarceration has burdened American taxpayers in major prison states, so is the use of inmate labor contributing to lost jobs, unemployment and decreased wages among workers — while corporate profits soar.

The use of forced labor in prisons took off in the early 1990s. Funny that. So did our incarceration rate:

Our prison industrial complex is nothing but corporate slave labor. Not saying people are purposefully being locked up to be a captive labor force for corporations, but with a largely privatized prison system, plus corporate contracts for labor going to said prisons, it’s an awfully interesting correlation, no?

Filed under Matt Bors politics cartoon prison industrial complex prison 1 percent We are the 99 percent Make that the 98 percent corporations privatization

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I want you to root for me. Everybody in Germany roots for Siemens. Everybody in Japan roots for Toshiba. Everybody in China roots for China South Rail. I want you to say, ‘Win, GE.’ I think this notion that it’s the population of the US against the big companies is just wrong.

General Electric Chairman Jeffrey Immelt, acting stunned that people might be a titch pissed off at Wall Street and corporations like GE. After hearing his answer, Leslie Stahl is nearly unable to form a complete question. He’s also Chairperson of the White House’s Council on Jobs and Competitiveness. Yeah, I’m sitting here like this:

And then I realize he truly just doesn’t get why we’d be furious with a company that’s offshoring jobs and paying no taxes.

I don’t understand how he can’t grasp the anger people feel. Perhaps he does and he’s an excellent actor. Either way, it’s obvious he’s almost offended that we’re not all TEAM GE!! Well, I don’t want you to “win” the class war.

I want your workers to keep their jobs, and make a good wage. That’s what I’m rooting for - is that cool? I still can’t get over Leslie Stahl. She asks him another question, but her face says what we’re thinking:


Filed under GE General Electric corporations seriously Economy politics Jeffrey Immelt fuckery Leslie Stahl Really dude? We are not rooting for GE Occupy Wall Street

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GOP Mega-Donor Koch Brothers' Company Tied To Global Criminal Misdeeds In Bombshell Article

A just-published bombshell article in the November issue of Bloomberg Markets magazine implicates Koch Industries, the company controlled by Republican mega-donors Charles and David Koch, in dozens of criminal acts around the globe over the past three decades.

According the report, company officials have been caught paying bribes to win contracts, trading with Iran in violation of the U.S. embargo, price-fixing, neglecting safety and ignoring environmental regulations.

The billionaire brothers are major donors to FreedomWorks, the Cato Institute, and dozens of other conservative think-tanks and nonprofits.

Read the full article here >

Do read the full article. It’s easy to dismiss this as wholly unsurprising, but it’s actually quite an outrage to see the catalog of sins amassed by the Koch brothers and their corporations.

Again, I’m going to suggest if corporations are people, these corporations should be held criminally responsible. 

Filed under Koch brothers crime politics corporations corporations are not people Republican republicans Heritage Foundation Cato Institute corporate money corporate influence conservative conservatives inequality criminal GOP

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I refuse to believe corporations are people until one is executed to the sounds of cheers of the Tea Party.

Ooh, or unless they’re assigned gender and a merger is denied because two same-gender corporations cannot enter into such a contract. Or unless one is denied the right to organize with others in the name of “cost-cutting.” Just a thought… 

Update: I’m not the only one thinking something similar.

Filed under random thought corporations corporations are not people politics Mitt Romney profit corporatocracy

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Rick Perry Compares Civil Rights Movement To GOP Fight For Lower Corporate Taxes

Yes. Really. 

I guess if corporations are people, that means they need civil rights. So if two corporations merge, is that now marriage? So what if two corporations of the same gender want to enter into a loving, same-sex merger marriage? Do they even have genders? So is the merger of many corporations polygamy?



Filed under Rick Perry corporation corporations corporations are not people politics GOP Conservative conservatives i can haz prezidant? 2012 I don't think that means what you think it means

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Rep. Gardner Tells Constituent Worried About Outsourcing To Find Another Job

At a town hall meeting on Monday, freshman Rep. Cory Gardner (R-CO) struggled with a question from a constituent who was worried about losing her job to outsourcing. When the woman explained that her employer is shipping jobs to Vietnam, Gardner offered a vague response about the need to “create a business environment that actually starts creating American jobs.” The woman was unsatisfied, saying that she wants to keep her current job, as was another constituent who complained that corporations “get tax incentives” for sending jobs overseas. “If that company can succeed, I would hope that they would share their success with you,” Gardner answered. “If they are not, maybe that’s not a great company to work for.”

Holy balls, y’all. Maybe Mitt Romney isn’t trolling us, and the GOP is instituting a new honesty policy. Implicit support for outsourcing, explicit support for personhood… I will donate $5 to the first GOP candidate who goes for brutal truth-telling and uses “Kill the Poor” by Dead Kennedys as their campaign song.

And then I’ll donate $50 to their opponent.

Filed under jobs outsourcing economy politics Cory Gardner conservative conservatives brutal honesty GOP republican republicans corporations WHERE ARE THE JOBS?

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We have to make sure that the promises we make in Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid are promises we can keep, and there are various ways of doing that,” Mr. Romney said. “One is we can raise taxes on people.”

“Corporations!” the protesters shouted, suggesting that Mr. Romney, as president, should raise taxes on large businesses. “Corporations!”

“Corporations are people, my friend,” Mr. Romney responded, as the hecklers shouted back, “No they’re not!”

“Of course they are,” Mr. Romney said, chuckling slightly. “Everything corporations earn ultimately goes to people. Where do you think it goes?” When someone in the front row angrily suggested that “it goes in their pockets,” Mr. Romney, becoming increasingly animated, asked: “Whose pockets? People’s pockets!

Mitt Romney, cheerfully laying out the “Corporations are people, too!” argument. 

Yeah… um, he’s right that earnings go to people. I just… I shudder, and I have trouble taking this seriously. Why do I get the feeling that Mitt Romney is an epic troll?

I report, you decide:


I see a wee bit o’ the troll face in this one…

(Source: The New York Times)

Filed under Mitt Romney corporations corporations are not people politics breaking my brain tax taxes tax the rich corporate corporate theft

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Could you imagine what the Tea Party would be saying right now if there was a law on the books that allowed immigrants to indefinitely avoid taxes on income sent back to family members in the old country, in Mexico and Venezuela and India? Imagine the uproar if Barack Obama, in the middle of this historic revenue crunch and “We’re so broke the world is going to end tomorrow!” debt-ceiling hystgeria, decided to declare a second “one-time tax holiday” for, say, unwed single mothers, or recipients of public assistance? Middle America would be running through the streets, firing shotguns out its truck window, waving chainsaws in mall lobbies, etc.

As it is, leading members of the Senate are seriously considering giving the most profitable companies in the world a total tax holiday as a reward for their last seven years of systematic tax avoidance. Hundreds of billions of potential tax dollars would disappear from the Treasury. And there isn’t a peep from anyone, anywhere, on this issue.

We’re seriously talking about defaulting on our debt, and cutting Medicare and Social Security, so that Google can keep paying its current 2.4 percent effective tax rate and GE, a company that received a $140 billion bailout en route to worldwide 2010 profits of $14 billion, can not only keep paying no taxes at all, but receive a $3.2 billion tax credit from the federal government. And nobody appears to give a shit. What the hell is wrong with people? Have we all lost our minds?

Matt Taibbi, "Corporate Tax Holiday in Debt Ceiling Deal: Where’s the Uproar?"

Yeah, I just can’t anymore…

Filed under Matt Taibbi politics I can't corporate theft corporatism corporations wrong fuck fuckery