Cognitive Dissonance

"Democracy! Bah! When I hear that I reach for my feather boa!" - Allen Ginsberg

Posts tagged republican

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Article: GOP state senator in Colorado says it was “a good thing” that Aurora killer James Holmes had 100-round magazine   

A GOP state senator in Colorado says it was “a good thing” that Aurora killer James Holmes had 100-round magazine. Bernie Herpin, a state senator elected in the wake of gun control laws that spurred the recall of several Democratic senators, made the comments in support of his bill to overturn Colorado’s ban on extended magazines and drums like the one James Holmes used to kill and maim over 70 people.

But it’s apparently a “good thing” he had it.

What a disgusting, heinous person.

Filed under colorado james holmes aurora shooting gun control disgusting gunblr politics republican gop

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Did you hear? I joined @Snapchat! For daily updates & behind-the-scenes footage follow: senatorrandpaul on the photo sharing app. I’m sending my first snap tonight.

Sen. Rand Paul, R-Ky. asking his fans to add him on Snapchat.

With Paul’s staffing history, I can see this going terribly wrong. And I’m not sure, but it might be some kind of violation of federal law to send unsolicited dick pics to a U.S. Senator. I’ll be curious to see how this plays out and if anyone actually adds him.

Facebook post here:

Filed under snapchat rand paul politics gop U.S. Senate social media Republican

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No, People In Colorado Are Not Using Food Stamps To Buy Pot

What happens when you mistake satire for real news? Headlines like the one above!

Remember Colorado State Sen. Vickie Marble? You last saw her claiming poverty was higher among those in the “black race” because they eat too much fried chicken.

Yeah. Her. She’s still in office.

Anyhow, she and the Douglas County Republican Party were duped by a satire site into believing Colorado food stamp recipients were using their benefits to buy pot. In her role as state senator, she filed a bill to stop it.


Filed under Vicki Marble Colorado News politics marijuana legalization republican satire alert lulz lol

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Liz Cheney Is Really, Really From Wyoming, Again (This Time With Dick Cheney Grandspawn)

In this new campaign ad, creatively titled “Daughters,” Liz Cheney’s daughters talk about their family’s “deep roots” in the state that their mother left during junior high school and returned to last year to run for Senate. She is totally a Wyoming … what is the word you people say… “gal.” Through and through. Her papa, Dick “Papa Dik” Cheney, lived there oncet, and even represented the state in Congress. In the last century. Also, pay no attention to their Aunt Mary and her heathen Virginia ways.


Oh, and what’s this I hear today? Liz Cheney’s hubby committing VOTER FRAUD in Wyoming? I’m not sure the tighty-righties will actually care, given that there’s no ACORN in sight - just a bunch of nuts. But say it ain’t so, Darth Lizzy.

Well, gee whiz. It’s so.

Filed under Liz Cheney Politics Wyoming US Senate Mike Enzi voter fraud Republican

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First off, one of these things is not like the others — Rob Ford is a conservative through and through. Also, Barack Obama and Tim Bishop have not admitted to smoking crack in a self-described “drunken stupor.”
And this guy KNOWS Toronto isn’t a part of the US, right? Not unless this is a launch of his “Annex ‘Merica’s Hat” plan…
Full story:


First off, one of these things is not like the others — Rob Ford is a conservative through and through. Also, Barack Obama and Tim Bishop have not admitted to smoking crack in a self-described “drunken stupor.”

And this guy KNOWS Toronto isn’t a part of the US, right? Not unless this is a launch of his “Annex ‘Merica’s Hat” plan…

Full story:

Filed under rob ford politics republican new york george demos tim bishop canada america's hat u.s. house of representatives

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Appropriations provided under the Consolidated and Further Continuing Appropriations Act, 2013 (P.L. 113-6) expire at 11:59 pm tonight. Unfortunately, we do not have a clear indication that Congress will act in time for the President to sign a Continuing Resolution before the end of the day tomorrow, October 1, 2013. Therefore, agencies should now execute plans for an orderly shutdown due to the absence of appropriations. We urge Congress to act quickly to pass a Continuing Resolution to provide a short-term bridge that ensures sufficient time to pass a budget for the remainder of the fiscal year, and to restore the operation of critical public services and programs that will be impacted by a lapse in appropriations.

Agencies should continue to closely monitor developments, and OMB will provide further guidance as appropriate. We greatly appreciate your cooperation and the work you and your agencies do on behalf of the American people.

Official memo from The White House Office of Management and Budget, which has directed government agencies to officially shut down non-essential services at midnight.

At 11:59 PM EDT, the government shut down because the Republicans do not like a law passed three years ago by a congressional majority, under a president re-elected by a majority of electoral college votes and the people of the U.S., and which has the public support of a majority of Americans. And they do this because they claim the people have spoken. We’re MAKING them drive off this cliff, they’re screaming, “LOOK WHAT YOU MADE US DO!” — all because we won’t negotiate with economic terrorists.

NEWSFLASH: The people spoke in 2012, with the re-election of the president. They did when the Affordable Care Act passed in Congress. 

And they will when all of you in the U.S. House come up for election in 2014. 

Filed under shutdown government shutdown politics news GOP U.S. Congress U.S. Senate U.S. House Republican government

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Boehner: Clean Continuing Resolution Is 'Not Going To Happen'

tl;dr: Republicans will shoot the hostage, and they want us to be okay with that. 

Filed under Republican Politics John Boehner government government shutdown get ready U.S. House U.S. Senate

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Michelle Obama Wants Kids To ‘Drink Up,’ Conservatives Now Hate Water

You know that jokey little joke bit of strategery some of us around here like to throw out whenever Obamz&Co come up with any kind of offering of opinion, or God forbid actual policy, and then are arbitrarily screamed at for being commie-fascist-welfare-taxer-Muslim-brothers-from-the-hood, no matter what the opinion was? We jokesters often like to posit that in response the prez should maybe come out in support of Republican ideas, like having another war (so close) or aborting things, or cuttin’ all these rich people’s taxes more than the less than zero they kinda pay now, or maybe just go ahead and kill Obamacare his ownself? And then maybe these haters of all things Oblackma would act like they have always been for taxing billionaires to pay for our abortion wars and we could get something done as a nation already?

Oh we have made ourselves laugh. But we are now thinking that mayhaps we were really and truly on to something? Because all Michelle Obama had to do was go out and tell some kid-folks that they should drink more water, and BAM! Water is now junk science (just like global warming) and no you should not drink it especially if she says so.


Here’s the tl;dr version: 

Michelle Obama: “Hey folks, replace one sody-pop with water because that’s healthy!”

Conservatives: “FUCK YOUR PINKO WATER, COMMIE! P.S. Hey you poors — no fizz for you, you still can’t have nice things. Because poor.”

There’s some days I’m convinced we’re all being trolled. This is one of those days. Here’s exactly what I pictured:

Filed under ow my brain politics conservatives water Michelle Obama Republican GOP I can't Brawndo It's what plants crave

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Texas GOP Candidate’s Top Adviser Tweets That Wendy Davis ‘Too Stupid To Be Governor’

A month after Texas Attorney General Greg Abbott (R) came under fire for tweeting to thank a supporter for a sexist attack on a potential Democratic opponent, his chief strategist is following his lead…

The article slammed Davis’s gun views, identifying her as “Abortion Barbie,” and dismissed her as “even dumber than her fake blonde hair would imply.”

The Texas director for the Koch Brother’s Americans for Prosperity, Peggy Venable, admonished Carney that while she too believed Davis to be “out of step” with the views of Texas, it was “not an issue of Wendy Davis’ intelligence.”

Dear GOP,

Yes, you still have a problem with women.


A majority of women

Filed under Wendy Davis Politics Texas Dave Carney GOP Republican

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Florida Gov. Rick Scott delays execution for Attorney General Pam Bondi’s fundraiser | The Raw Story

Mind you, this is a woman who is currently fighting to speed up executions in Florida. Except for when she needs to raise funds, of course. Then Marshall Lee Gore can wait.

Phyllis Novick, the mother of one of the women murdered by Gore, speaks for many of us when she questioned the priorities of the elected officials in Florida, saying, “What’s going on down there? It’s ridiculous.”

Indeed. What the hell, Florida?

Filed under Rick Scott Pam Bondi Republican Politics News Death Penalty Marshall Lee Gore Crime Justice Injustice Florida What the hell Florida?