Posts tagged seriously?!
Posts tagged seriously?!
My friend LJ posted this and wrote, “Before you make a tweet, you might want to figure out what the hashtag you’re hijacking means.” True story.
*sigh* 11:35 AM. This morning.
No, you shallow fuckers. No one cares about your Kim K dress.
I can’t. I just can’t…
I see these asshats joining up with the NRA for a pink and rhinestone “from my cold dead hands” fashion show and now my brain is full of fuckery.
Is it too early to start drinking?
This is absurd.
[Image: Hi Dr. Garner. My name is K—— and my son Matthew was a little stinker today at the library. He went to play on my computer but instead he played on a student of yours computer in the library that looked just like mine but with stickers. Anyways he wrote Jesus in big letters thinking I’d be real proud of him. When your student Megan came back from the bathroom I guess he deleted a paper or something she was working on. He wanted to save it to show daddy when he got back from the store. She was real angry and said I had to email you. Anyways, please don’t fail Megan because my son wanted to do something nice. What he did was wrong and I told him so but he’s only five and real smart lol. I am emailing you the file he made to. Thank you very much.]
So this happened yesterday… I was finishing my final for my Editing and Publishing class when I dashed to the bathroom before printing it to submit. Mind you, this is 30 minutes before it’s due. When I got back, there was a little kid on my computer, and this was where my project used to be: ￼
He’d already clicked save. I tried to undo. No dice. By that point, I’d been awake since 10 AM Thursday.
I told her she absolutely had to email my professor to tell her what happened. At first, she refused, saying it wasn’t that big of a deal, her son was only trying to do something nice, and sorry that inconvenienced me, etc. I told her that it *was* that big of a deal, and she rolled her eyes and agreed to do it. A screen shot of her email is posted above.
I literally could not believe what I was reading. The “lol” was the cherry on top of that shit sundae. I posted it on Facebook, ranting about this woman’s “fuck trophy” (the profane name I call unremarkable children who do terrible things and are held up by their parents as just such wittle pwecious twophies). The 50+ comments from my friends on Facebook made my day. A sampling: ￼
I made one of the comments into a PSA: ￼
Luckily, my professor has a soul. If my professor hadn’t had said soul, I’d be putting Kathy’s last name and email on this post.
Here’s the gist of why I’m posting this: I don’t care if you bring your kid to the main university library, even during finals week. I don’t really care much for children, but I will tolerate them. But first, teach them basic manners and not to touch other people’s shit.
Before this, I saw a parent who was doing it right. He was clearly engrossed in what looked like engineering homework, and his son was sitting next to him drawing. His son said loudly, “Hey DAD—” and before he could continue, his dad shushed him and said, “Library voice, remember? There’s a lot of people working on homework. Now what do you need?”
Folks like Kathy, you’re doing it wrong.
Ted Nugent, justifying remarks which have earned him an investigation from the Secret Service.
Dear Ted Nugent,
Things you are not:
Things you could be:
Things you don’t have:
Things you do have:
That should clear up some of the confusion, you unbelievable asshole.
Rick Santorum seems to catch himself right before calling President Barack Obama a nigger at about 15 seconds into the video.
Glen Coco at Vice has the scoop:
This is presidential candidate Rick Santorum (holy shit does that look scary written down) delivering a speech in Janesville, Wisconsin a couple of days ago. And, as you can see in the above video, it seems like he might have been on the verge of calling Obama a “nigger”… Santorum’s rolling out the racist gaffes about once a quarter so far in 2012, after this slip of the tongue back in January. (He was actually saying “blah people”, guys! Duhhh.)
Wow. I’m really not sure how he could walk this back, but honestly, with today’s GOP migrating backwards in time, I’m not sure he needs to walk it back.
And that is so very depressing.
“Obviously, the vast majority of gays are loyal Americans — and witty and stylish to boot! But a small percentage of gays are going to be narcissistic hothouse flowers like Bradley Manning. Couldn’t they just work for JetBlue? America would be a lot safer right now if gays in an “awkward place” psychologically could do no more damage than grabbing a couple of beers and sliding down the emergency chute. Look at the disaster one gay created under our punishing “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy. What else awaits America with the overturning of a policy that was probably put there for a reason (apart from being the only thing Bill Clinton ever did that I agreed with)?”
—The always adorable Ann Coulter, once again speaking out of turn [via]
This woman is a miserable caricature of a conservative. The whole column is enraging. What the hell is her point here?
Glenn Beck tied WikiLeaks, and its leader, Julian Assange, to George Soros — whom Beck has repeatedly attacked as sitting at the center of a vast array of secretive organizations determined to fundamentally alter American society and the world — during his weekly “At Your Beck And Call” segment on Wednesday’s “O’Reilly Factor.” Beck has focused on WikiLeaks — whose release of classified State Department cables has unearthed scores of revelations about the inner workings of American diplomacy — during his television show this week, and so O’Reilly asked him what he thought of the scandal. He replied that he sees it as an attempt to create chaos around the world and destabilize governments. Then, he began comparing Assange to Soros. Assange, Beck said, “loves to have just all-open society. Sound familiar?” O’Reilly picked up the reference to Soros’ Open Society Institute. “You think Assange knows George Soros?” “I know Assange is being represented by the attorney who does the pro bono work for George Soros’ Open Society Insitute,” Beck said. He went on to say that the WikiLeaks scandals were part of an effort to create a “perfect storm” of chaos, and compared the organization to Al Qaeda. Both, he said, are trying to take down America by “a thousand cuts.” O’Reilly asked if Beck believed, “in your heart,” that Soros was “in bed with Assange, knows what his operation is, had a hand in it.” “I don’t think he had a hand in it, but I think he absolutely knows what the operation is,” Beck said
*headdesk* Is anything not connected to George Soros at this point? I mean, how powerful is this guy supposed to be? He’s like motherfucking Cthulhu in Beck’s eyes. If he’s so powerful, how can anyone defeat him? I can’t fucking believe the insanity. It’s just gone beyond mindblowing into straight-jacket territory.
Really? With all the important shit going on like this, Sen. McCain still finds time to wish Snooki a happy birthday? Being an old obstructionist must be a blast…
We’re all doomed.
On Tuesday afternoon, a set of emails surfaced on the Philadelphia news site Phawker. Phawker said that the emails showed the “100% for real” correspondence between Olbermann and…
This is my state. For fuck’s sake…
Hey congrats on the whole “doctor” thing. I really could not feel any prouder of you. Unless of course you *finally* had a baby. Sorry, I just know what an amazing mom you’ll be and it seems like you were working on that dissertation forever. As in, many years. I’m not saying I don’t think that it’s remarkable that you finished it and defended it and passed, but you’d be an extraordinary mother, I just know it.
Congrats though. You’ve tackled one heck of a feat. It’s awesome that you’ve got 50+ congratulatory Facebook comments about your accomplishment. Just imagine how many you’d get if you announced you’re having a baby. Can’t wait to see you at Rachel’s wedding. Yippee.
(submitted by Anonymous)
You aren’t a person until you’re a mother. Duh.
I always knew getting that PhD would be a waste of time unless I had a kid as well. What woman wants the title “Doctor” when you can have the title “mommy?”
I think it’s harder to get the “Doctor” title than the “mommy” title. Shit, you can just lie still on your back for 3 minutes and let the lil’ bun bake at 98.7 degrees for 9 months while basking in the glory of impending mommyhood. At least that’s what these mommyjackers make it sound like….
This irritated the shit out of me. Probably because school is kicking my ass and I’m stressing about applying to doctoral programs, etc. So seriously, STFU.
Ever since I was a young child, I’ve been able to, you know, “sense” the auras of people and things. I’m not psychic exactly- but I predict we’re going to be seeing a lot of this movie over here.
(submission from Jenny D., amen.)
Who doesn’t know the famous Jesus quote:
ENGLISH MOTHERFUCKER, DO YOU SPEAK IT?!
Greatest TINH review ever.
Jesus spoke English, guys. Just FYI.
Wasn’t Jesus a white American?
Netflix really needs a “You found this review: HYSTERICAL” button.
I just can’t add anything to this…
"It took a long time to end slavery; yes it did. But it also took a long time to start slavery, and it started small and it started with seemingly innocent ideas. And then a little court order here and a little court order there, and a little more regulation here and a little more regulation there, and before we knew it America had slavery. It didn’t come over on a ship to begin with as an evil slave trade, the government began to regulate things because the people needed answers, they needed solutions. It started in a courtroom and then it went to the legislatures, that’s how slavery began."
Here’s the audio:
I really think my brain just broke.
P.S. If the audio doesn’t work, click here.
Teh gayness is transmitted via juice box.
I can’t make this shit up. But Alex Jones can!